Gilligans Island

LAURA JAYNE GILL

1990-Present

Whether you got a handjob from her at a bus-stop, or you threw a drink down her dressed as a bumblebee, or sat next to her in Y9 art after the Art Teacher called her fat and moved her into your class, you'll know Laura Gill when you see her.

That is, if you do see her. At 3 Feet 9, she is the smallest person in Haydock, nay Europe. And i've been to the CIRCUS. Moving swiftly on, Laura Gill manages to brighten your depressing little lives with her off colour humour, her off colour tan and her humourous dole-enducing appedicitis. So this blog is dedicated to honouring her!

I've had many a fun time with this girl, probably starting in school, but all i can really remember from her in school is us making fun of people bigger than us behind their backs, and teachers thinking my reputation was being dragged down by my tagging on to her crowd. And then when we left school, our friendship "ended" when we didn't speak for about 2 years. But it was some other girls fault, for being a blatant liar!!!! And then 1 song, popular in the 60s or 70's dragged us back together.

That song was Bette Davis Eyes by Kim Carnes, which Laura one day popped up on MSN (we'd spoken a few times and she told me she could drive which was a lie!) and sent it to me. And after that, we both listened to it on repeat for about a week. And it still stands as my most played song on Itunes! Laura and my goodself then at some point arranged to go round Wigan, her first time EVER, and I took her to PADA, good old Pada. And then we were back on track!

For the next year and a half (bringing us to now) she proceeded to hang around me like a bad smell, popping up on MSN to talk about Two Pints or specifically, Kelly, from Two Pints, the then nations "Susan Boyle of 2008". In this time, she gave me many a lol, including a time we patrolled the streets of Manchester at Gay Pride together, making fun of the many kings and queens we came across. Not literally. Infact i think I may have blogged about that in the past!!!!

She's always been a REAL pal to me, and with upcoming Gaga-age, our friendship will never end! In all seriousness she is a wonderful LITTLE woman, and a very good friend to me! So welldone Laura Gill, and heres hoping you dont get hit by a tram or something before the 28th of June. She has budgies or something too.

In a non-Laura-Gill topic, Susan Boyle came 2nd on BGT. Which is fair do's coz Diversity wer really good, and Boyle will have an album out in about a week. Plus she was namechecked on a Simpsons Promo, so shes in the same league as Maude Flanders now! Today i worked at JD. Exciting. it was fun today actually, had a good ol' time!!!

Going 2 bed now! Nighty Night, Thanks for reading. For more on Laura Gill, type "Laura Gill" into Facebook, or watch Crimewatch. xxx

Darren can't do games today...as he is dead.

Tonight, I saw a film, as i recall it was a horror film.

Thats right kiddos, i watched "Tormented" at the cinema avec Frankie and Rachel, despite the fact 4 days ago i said "NO IM NOT WATCHING THIS FILM AT THE CINEMA". Well to be fair, until i got to the ticket desk and heard Frankie ask for 3 tickets for "Tormented", i was fully under the impression i was going watching Ben Stiller's hilarious sequel, "Night at the Museum 2". But as much as I hate to admit it, I thourougly enjoyed it! It turned out to be more comedy than horror, and the villain was ridiculous. So thanks for deceiving me girls, it turned out to be the funnest deception since that time Maude Flanders PRETENDED to be dead for 9 years.

Speaking of coming back from the dead, talks about a new Buffy Movie have arisen. Yey for me right? POSSIBLY. Because no Gellar, no Hannigan, no Brendon, no Benson, etc, and possibly worst of all: no Whedon! It's basically being reinvented by people who have been involved throughout its run from original 1992 movie through the series. But i still can't decide whether it will ruin the series for me! I am excited to see it though, so alls gravy AS OF YET. If they cast like, her from highschool musical who flashed her tits all over the internet, then i wont be too happy. But we'll see wont we. And yes, this IS the kind of thing i care about.

TODAY i went to the Party and Play Funhouse with Ayler and Nami, also my mum and Akiyo, and although it was packed i still ended up on the slide. Which i didn't hate. Except for when i sort of rolled down it. And Aylers getting into Pokemon, and we've been playing Pokemon Green on the gameboy, which i hate to say is becoming addicted. I feel like its Y6 again! Anyway its time to bed, have to be up in 8 hours to prepare for a drivey driving lesson. And by prepare, i mean get dressed.

xxxx

Good GRAVY it's been a while!

My name's Nathan O'leary and I haven't blogged in about 8 months

Thankyou for sharing, Nathan. Take a seat

How things change in 8 months!!! We'll start with the most important: Thomas the Tank Engine is OVER, and Ben 10 now rules the O'leary roost, specifically Alien Force. I myself am a fan of "Echo Echo", but Ayler much prefers "Goop". Nami just likes to bite on the corners of books, but at 8 months old (8 months old already!) what can you expect? And she also can say "Gok", following the trait of O'leary children's strange obsessions with Gok Wan.

Aside from this, I managed to land myself a job at the one, the only, JD Sports, shovelling footwear off to anyone i can force into buying it. I've even found myself buying some of the stuff in there, which, considering I only applied because Tickle did and i dont think I'd stepped in a JD since I was about 6 before applying, is pretty "exciting". So yes, no more dole, and it's the best feeling EVER! Actually the second best, after going into the dole and telling them you've landed a job!

Friendship wise, I'm finding myself with less and less friends everytime I look! Not in a "eurgh we hate Nathan" way (hopefully), but more and more people continue to leave my life (or sometimes the COUNTRY, NATALIE CORLESS AND JESSICA HOWELL; we'll get onto this soon), but I can still rely on the Chris', the Frankies, the Mykes, the Rachels, the Laura Gills, the Pauls, the Katies of the world to keep me sane and entertained, or my new word; sanetertained. I just made it up.

Speaking of sanity, I seem to be lacking it dearly of late. My obsession with Maude Flanders has turned from "unhealthy" to "dangerous", I've found myself watching episodes with her in to soothe me to sleep. As I said to Liam the other night during a 6:00 AM heated discussion between myself, him, and Emma after some horrifically dodgy takeaway and Chav Pingu, "I don't fancy her or anything, I respect her too much". I don't know if that makes me less of a pervert, or more.

There's much I want to talk about! I forgot about blogging, and how fun it is! It's just ALL ABOUT ME! I want to talk about the hideously disgraceful family i served at work today. I finished at 1:00 and they trapsed in at about 12:40 and started bombarding me with questions about K-Swiss shoes. For you're entertainment, i've written it as if it were a play. A REALLY shit one.

Elderly Chav Nan: ERE RIGHT CAN I HAVE THESE IN A 2

Me: Let me have a look- these ones only start in a 3

Elderly Chav Nan (ECN for short): SO U DONT HAVE UM IN A 2

Me: No, they start in a 3

ECN: Not a 2?

Me: No, 3

Shockingly WideFaced Mum (SWFM for short): HERE CAN I GET THESE ONES IN A 3 FOR HIM (she had 3 sons, 1 aged 12, despite the fact she couldn't of been older than 24, 25 at a push)

Me: Yes

(Nathan trundles off to get the shoes, as Piper hides from the family so they dont ask him for any more shoes)

Basically i bring 1 pair out, for 1 kid, they buy them, another pair for the young lad, they buy them, then this 12 year old who had been dragged up backwards through a Jeremy Kyle Special, starts to CRY because he wants the shoes we DONT have. He tries a size 3 air max on, and cries more because they"dont fit" despite the fact they obviously do, he just couldn't be arsed putting them on properly. So i go and get a 4, its about 10 to 1 now and i can see Burger King in the distance luring me over. He tries the 4 on and cries again because "he can feel a lump on his toe", so i go and get the 4 in the K-Swiss and he says "they're ok", but because his mum CHUCKLES, he cries AGAIN and throws the shoe at me! So i just took them down to the front of the shop and beat him down with a shoe filler. I wish. I had 2 grin and bear it.

RANT OVER!

Now, where was I. I'm going to hold a "Return to Blogspot" award ceremony to fill in some gaps of my life

Best Christening of 2009: Ayler and Nami's in January. Also counts as "only Christening of 2009"

Funniest Radio Station: Bailrigg Fm, for reading out pretty much anything Me, Myke, Katie, Bob, Megan, Chris and Michaela email in saying.

Best Cartoon Character: It has to be Maude Flanders. It just has to be. For helping me sleep at night

Most Inspirational Person: I've become a big fan of Susan Boyle's, because I'm a sheep and i like what she stands for

Shocking Death of 2009: Andy Hallett AKA Lorne from Angel, may he rest in peace

Funnest Filming: The first day of filming "addicted", before it got a bit tedious

Shocking Exit of 2009: Natalie and Jess, for leaving the country to work in France for 8 months!

Best Place of Work: I'm gonna have to say JD but i do rather enjoy my Pie Job still

Best Detonation of a Hydrogen Bomb of 2009: Despite Korea's best efforts, its going to have to go to Juliet Burke of "LOST" fame

Easy to Talk to Award: Myke to the Geeleher who listens to all my rants and as far as I know doesn't just scroll past them and says "yeah"

Homewrecker Award: Ben 10, for destroying Thomas' stellar reputation in the O'leary house

Best Singer: I have to go with Gaga, because I'm going seeing her live in June!!!!!!!!!

Hopefully i'll continue to blog and they wont be as ridiculously LONG as this 1! xxxx You stay classy San Diego